Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Emptiness when you are not here

Do you know how missing a person could be like ?

I bet everyone knows that .
But how far could you last and survive ?

My kind of missing would be for the one that I love .
Yesterday hubby went back for his ns le .
Acc him all the way to Joo koon .
But I have to say I really miss him .
From the moment he left, I already started missing him .

Well I had my day off ytd and imagine my day .
Sleeping, wake for lunch, eat medication
went back to sleep, wake for dinner w/rol, eat medication
Talk to him on the phone den sleep again .

Through out my waking moments and in my dream .
He is everywhere .
It's like even when we spent the whole week tgt I still felt that it wasn't enough .
All my mind can think of is him .

I dun expect anyone to understand how I feel .
But I felt this intense feeling tat I wann him to be by my side for the rest of my life .

People would always say you need to lose the things before realising how important they are to you .

I realise that and though the ways of getting him back wasn't how I expected .
But I am not sorry .
For one instance I didn't lie .
Anyway I no need to explain .

I just wann to say the feelin of missing you is killin me .

I feel so weird to not be able to see you when I wake up .
This makes me feel lost .
Miserable when you are not here.

The thoughts of when I end work you will not be there to fetch me just give me no motivation .

I suddenly miss you being by my side nagging at me to rmb to take my medication .

People must be thinking that I am too much with these feelings that I have .
But it really feels like all or nothing .

I feel like...
A bird with a injured pair of wings .
A fish that is out of water .
A toddler without her favourite bolster
A child who is without her parents
A teenager who is without their phone
A wife who is without her husband
Just like a me who is without you .

I love you my baby hubby !
I dunno and cannot guarantee that we would be forever .
I dun wann to give words or promises that can't be confirm or fulfilled .
So I have to say I really love you .
Hope and pray hard that we could really last .
I'll cherish you, please cherish me too .

I dun ever wann to shed tears anymore .
Even if I had to I hope the reasons behind it are out of happiness not sorrow .

Crossing my fingers ^.^
I love you !
Your beloved baby wifey .

No comments: